Monday, November 30, 2009

My First Thanksgiving In Review

Let the above picture serve as evidence that I thoroughly enjoyed my first Thanksgiving. I'll tell you about the weekend.

As usual, we had a whirlwind tour with lots of driving and visiting. I'd like to send a special thanks for the hospitality to Gammy and Grampa, and Nanna and Gramp. My long weekend began in the deep fryer (as you saw), but after that I took a nap in the car and I when I woke up I was in a different house and Cousin Yvette was there. We played hoops together (she has the same basketball contraption that I do). She has some pretty good moves.

I then examined her head and noticed that she truly doesn't have much hair. That's interesting because she is the same size as me, if not bigger. Oh well, I'm sure the hair will come in soon. At least she doesn't have to deal with bed head and hat head like I do.
We traded curiosities and kept touching each other's head. She's got a heck of a grip. I should know- she gave me one of those old church lady, capillary bursting pinches on the cheek.
I had my first Thanksgiving dinner at Gammy and Grampa's and played with my "little" cousins. I also saved some of my biggest smiles and hammed it up with Ge and Pop-Pop. Pop showed me how the ladies and the gentleman ride and Ge taught me the correct lyrics to 'A Peanut Sat On a Railroad Track.' It is currently my favorite song. Cousin Kyle taught me this song a few months ago and it's been a hit ever since.
We finished the weekend at Nanna and Gramp's house. I did a lot of smiling and laughing there too. I was looking forward to eating some of Daddy's fried turkey, but by the time he failed to check how much propane was left, then started cooking the turkey, ran out of propane, drove to get some more, and finally finished, it was almost my bedtime. There was no time to puree that supposedly delicious bird. Oh well, maybe next year.
The ride home was a little rough at the end. I got tired of being in my car seat and only stopped crying for 20 minutes as a result of Daddy singing about all the different animals at Old McDonald's Farm. That Old McDonald sure has a lot of noisy, out-of-tune animals. When we finally arrived home last night I noticed that some of the houses in our neighborhood had strings of small lights and fake fire candles in the windows. I guess our neighbors are starting to dress their houses up like the department stores did the day after Halloween. This must mean that this whole Christmas thing is getting closer. Indeed, this is all still very bizarre to me. So long Thanksgiving. Christmas here I come.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

My First Turkey Day

Daddy says that deep frying is the best way to enjoy Tom Turkey. I sure hope Mommy makes some pureed, deep fried Tom for me. Anything will be better than that Gerber 'Turkey & Turkey Gravy.'

I'm taking the day off tomorrow and the rest of the weekend so that I may recover from entertaining and an overstuffed belly. Please have a safe and happy Thanksgiving, and...

Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Conspiracy Theory

I'm going to the mall with Cousin Wade today to pay a visit to this Santa character. Apparently, Wade is planning on sitting on Santa's lap so that he may demand gifts of him. I think I'll just observe. This morning, Daddy and I read part (not all because I kept trying to eat the book) of 'Twas The Night Before Christmas in preparation for today's visit. It was my first glimpse of the jolly, overweight, tobacco-smoking old man dressed in red. If I were Wade I would be scared...very scared. If I could I would run. Instead, I'll stay in my stroller and hope that Daddy doesn't get me too close to the action. It would be nice to make some gift demands and ask some questions, but it's probably not worth the risk. I'd like to know how this guy really does it and why. It all seems a little strange, but it's not like there could possibly be a vast Santa conspiracy and that mommies and daddies everywhere would lie to their sweet little baby angels. I'll just take the gifts and ask questions later.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The Agreement

Mommy returned to work today. It turns out that she was negative for swine flu. Who knows what was wrong with her? All I know is that it was great having her home, sick or not. Even if I was hanging out with Daddy I could demand to see her whenever I wanted. He and I would peer over the couch and look at her. If she wasn't sound asleep and drooling she'd look at me and smile and I would return the favor. I'd then pat her on the head and tell her to get back to sleep.

So now it's just the boys at home. Onyx is being a good boy and we are having fun playing together. He does need a lesson on sharing, but at least he's gentle with me. Please, don't attempt this on your own. Onyx would probably want to play a little more rough with anyone else, particularly with Mommy or Daddy. You see, he and I have an agreement: he's cool with me as long as I occasionally and "accidentally" drop some food from my highchair.

Good boy, Onyx.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Matthew the Antibody

As you may recall, Mommy has been sick with a still unconfirmed case of the flu. She is getting much better, but gets tired after trying to do too much. You may be wondering what is going on inside Mommy and how she's getting better. I've prepared a video to demonstrate the basic struggle between her immune system and the virus it's battling. I'm playing the role of the microscopic circulating antibody who is ready to throw-down on that pesky swine flu virus. The video camera and my toys, painstakingly modeled by me to represent the virus, are in my antibody path of destruction.


Mommy is returning to work tomorrow. Today, Daddy and I will get her off the couch and bring her to the grocery store in order to reintroduce her to the world outside our living room. She'll ride in one of those motorized carts and bark instructions for what groceries to get.

Yesterday, I developed my first cough. I only coughed a few times and it doesn't seem to bother me. Everything else appears to be normal. I must have picked up the cold Daddy has, but without his crying and whining. This cold, however, is about to be bested by my own antibodies. Go get 'em, guys!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Quarantined!

That's what the big sign outside our house says..."Quarantined!" There's also yellow tape around the yard and men wearing protective suits coming to and fro. One of the men is making me wear this:

This is all on account of the doc telling Mommy yesterday that she has H1N1. Lab results will confirm in several days, which is about the time when Mommy will probably be feeling better. Mommy can't go back to work until Tuesday. Woo-hoo!...four day weekend with Mommy! I do wish that it were under better circumstances. The CDC recommends keeping Mommy in her own room with the door shut, that she should wear a mask if she must go into the kitchen or bathroom, that she keep six feet away from anyone and everyone at all times, and for us to avoid making eye contact with her. Sounds reasonable.

How am I feeling? Great! I got the vaccine two weeks ago. So don't worry Mommy, I'll take care of you. For the rest of you out there- stay healthy and...

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Origins of Matthew

Hi, it's me, Matthew. It's probably a little difficult to see me when I'm wearing these white pajamas. My complexion is so white and pale that I'm probably all hair, eyes, and lips to you. Why is my skin like this? It may be because if the sun happens to direct some of its rays at me Mommy will jump in the way and sacrifice her own body just to keep the light off of my skin. With these kinds of things Mommy is faster than the speed of light. She says that, like her and Daddy, the sun will burn my skin and I'll become red if only exposed to the sun for a few seconds. I've gathered that being overly white has something to do with my heritage. Now, I know I'm not going to remember to include and get everything right, but I did some investigating on my heritage and this is what I found. Daddy says that I am a European mixture: from French political exiles to horse stealing Dutchmen, pillaging Norwegians, and mostly, "silly" Irishmen. I'm not sure what the "silly" refers to but Daddy says we should just keep it at that for now. He said he'd clue me in when I'm 21 if I haven't figured it out by then. Mommy and Daddy predicted they would have very light complected, almost translucent skinned children. I must be living verification of that prediction.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Caretaker

Good morning. I don't have a lot of time to write because apparently I'm doing the caretaking today. Mommy is back to work after being sick, but now Daddy appears to be sick (wimp). Even Onyx has seemed a little under the weather with a runny nose and drooling; although today he is relentless in trying to get Daddy and I to play with him. So I guess today I have to wear the big boy pants and take care of everything. I should probably go put both Daddy and Onyx down for a nap. Evidently, the "caretakee," if you will, has become the caretaker.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Birthday Suit For Two

Happy Birthday, Gammy and Aunt Bethy! I hope you both have a great day. I know I'm enjoying the day. I was lucky enough to wear the birthday suit a little longer this morning in order to account for two birthdays. I felt so natural and "free" while doing my morning exercise. Check out that muscle tone!


I have to commend the cleanup crew for a job well done this morning. After the photo shoot they found where I had taken the liberty to relieve myself in the crib. They also found some dog hair in my bait and tackle region after I rolled around on the floor. I typically like to have a bottle to help settle me down after the production. Well, after this morning's shoot, I proceeded to spit up all over myself just as I had finished the bottle. I haven't done this in a while, but it felt good. Thank you, cleanup crew, whoever you are, for taking care of all of this. By the way, Mommy, I most certainly will need a bath tonight. In fact, I may need two.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Where's My Size?

The other day I visited Cousin Yvette's blog in which the title of the last posting read, "Where's My Hair?" Her mommy went on to write that Yvette had gone to the doctor the other day and was measured at, "17lbs.6oz and 26.5 inches long (60th and 75th percentiles, respectively)." Wow, Yvette is 7 weeks younger than me but is practically my size! It's not like she's one of those "worlds biggest" Chinese babies you see in the tabloids at the grocery store. Those babies are known to devour their own mothers. No, Yvette is where she should be. Instead, I believe that I'm soon to be medically labeled, "Shrimp." So Yvette, what is your secret? Are you taking performance enhancing milk, prunes, and apples? Perhaps all your energy and nutrient intake is helping your body grow, whereas most of mine is going towards the growth of my luxurious, strawberry-blond hair. Let's make a deal, shall we? I'll trade you some hair (I may even have a little left over for your daddy) for some of that "nutrition" you're using. Either way, Yvette, the next time you see me please don't push me around. I'll be good and obey. Remember, after this baby development thing girls typically grow faster and earlier than boys do. I probably won't catch up to you and the other 35% of babies out there until I'm 16. Daddy says he knows how this works because of the childhood growth difference between he and your mommy. I'm hoping that history, at least in this situation, does not repeat itself.

Friday, November 13, 2009

The Princess and Me

So I woke up this morning at 4:38 AM for my pre-breakfast meal. It's enough of a meal to fill my tummy to help me go back to sleep until 6 or 7. This is now what I normally do. This morning, however, I decided to remain awake. I guess Mommy's excitement for Aunt Bethy's arrival today has rubbed off on me. My excitement kept me awake. Mommy's excitement could have slept until 6 AM. Mommy is feeling much better today and returned to work after we hung out for a couple of hours this morning. The rest of the day will entail getting ready for the weekend. Mommy says we have to have everything sparkling clean for the princess's arrival. Mommy and I get to have Aunt Bethy all to ourselves. I've got a lot in store for her: like having her change my borderline blowout diapers, applying my eye medicine, cleaning my face after eating pureed meat, etc. I figure Mommy could use more time to just sit back and relax. Then, if Aunt Bethy fails to pay attention to me for even a few seconds, I'll use my attention grabbing technique of yelling, "hey":

Okay, so I'm a little tired this morning after missing the rest of my sleep. Daddy likes that I can just fall asleep while eating in my high chair. His reasoning centers around the fact that instead of increasing my crankiness, like in the past, I just fall asleep instead. He's hoping that I start doing this in other places, such as the floor when I've been playing and crawling around, or while I'm in my crib at 4:38 AM.

Well, I really need to continue this nap. It's important that I restore as much attention summoning energy as I can get in order to keep Aunt Bethy on her toes.

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Importance of Sleep in Children

Do you know what happens when I miss my afternoon nap? To answer that question all you have to do is watch this video which was taken during the eating of my dinner Tuesday night.

That's actually the first time I've fallen asleep in my high chair but not the first time I've missed my afternoon nap. I guess you could say that, in addition to missing some sleep, the food and dinner conversation were a bit bland that night.

Yesterday, in celebrating eight months outside the womb, I went to the doctor. Unfortunately, it wasn't that much fun. Instead, it turns out that I have an eye infection. It's probably a result of having my first observed-by-adults cold this past weekend. The cold was characterized by a runny nose and waking every hour Sunday night. If anything else was bothering me, such as a sore throat or a headache, I'm not telling because I'm a tough guy. I'd rather just continuously wake Mommy and Daddy throughout the night. So now I'm feeling better but poor Mommy is sick with a cold. Then again, I don't mind that she's sick because that means she gets to stay home with me today. She'll help Daddy hold me down so they can put drops in my eyes. The drop application process is silly and the drops don't bother me. Maybe I can get this on video. I'm just glad to be in my Mama's arms. Maybe if I snuggle with her I'll make her feel better.

By the way, I came into eight months weighing 17 pounds, 14 ounces (my height was not taken). I'm still, and probably always will be, somewhere in the 25% range on the growth chart. I really thought that my protruding, dunlop belly would push me past some of my peers. I guess not.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Eight Months

Who's eight months old? Me? Already? Daddy tells me that I'm getting so big and agile that it's getting very difficult to take this monthly picture. I just can't seem to stop grabbing that piece of paper. The photographer took about 30 pictures and only two came out without that paper in my mouth. Anyway, yes, it's been eight awesome months. Thanks again, Mommy.

How big is Matthew?

Soooo Big!!!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Library Hopping

Hello, everyone. There's not too much going on this morning. I have almost a full day of errands and fun planned, so I'm getting my crawling exercises in early. The evolution of my crawl is quite remarkable. Okay, maybe not remarkable, but at least I'm creeping and crawling forward and not only moving sideways in a roll. If it weren't for my big, healthy belly I'd be going even faster. I have to figure out how to get that belly off the ground and move at the same time. What do I like to crawl to? Mainly wires and stereo equipment, or whatever makes Mommy and Daddy get up off their seat.

I'm pretty excited because today we're trying out a new story time at a library in the next town over. We plan to hit up all the local libraries to fill the week with these awesome story times. This afternoon, I have to go to the dentist with Daddy. I guess he needs someone to hold his hand. I plan to ask the dentist if he knows of any secrets to getting those first teeth to present themselves. But first, following my post, Daddy, Onyx, and I are walking to the bank. We're not sure if they allow babies and dogs in the bank lobby. If not, Daddy plans to tie either one or both of Onyx and I outside to a tree.

Happy Tuesday!

Monday, November 9, 2009

Laughing

On August 24th, I told you all to "stay tuned for the premiere of my giggle." Thank you for staying tuned in. Now, 78 days later, as rare a video (from Friday night) as that taken of the Loch Ness Monster and Bigfoot, and without further delay, me laughing. Enjoy.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Awesome

I have so many things to report! Where do I begin? I'm practically out of breath thinking about all three of the awesome things that have occurred over the past 24 hours. It's like when Mommy and Aunt Bethy get together after not seeing each other for a long time. There's so much they have to catch up on. They begin conversing so fast that, unless you record it so that the conversation can be slowed down, broken down into bits and pieces, and analyzed by scientists, there's no way you can understand what they're saying. I'll start with yesterday's story time (Cuddle Time), or as I like to call it, Awesome Time.

First, let me begin by mentioning that I was a little tired by the time Awesome Time, 11:30, rolled around. I woke up at 3:55 AM that morning and stayed awake for about an hour. I'm not sure why I did this. I then slept until 8 AM but refused to take my usual two hour morning nap. Daddy tried his hardest, but I bested him in the, "You need a nap/No I don't," competition. I did not fall asleep until the exact moment we pulled into the library parking lot. Of course I then I had to be woken from my 30 second slumber. I only mention the above because things can get a little rough if I get too sleepy. Anyway, I had no problems with being over-tired during Awesome Time. There were seven other babies there with their mothers. My Daddy was the lone male over the age of one. I'm happy to report that he was able to make it through okay. It was awesome hanging out with these other babies, and the librarian put on an awesome show. For one awesome half-hour, we listened and participated in an awesome selection of literature, poetry, and music. I even screamed with excitement at the librarian. Who of you can honestly say that you've screamed at a librarian in a library? That's what I thought. I recommend story time to all you babies out there. Please visit and support your local library. Libraries are awesome.

Last night I had an awesome bath, as usual. I'm really good at splashing now. Notice that at the very end of the video (below) that I stood and emptied my bladder. It's a relieving feeling and it sounds awesome as the pee hits the water. It's now my new and awesome thing.

Finally, during breakfast this morning, I saw something I'd never seen before. I can't explain it. I looked out the kitchen window and noticed little white things everywhere, floating down onto the trees and ground. I couldn't believe my eyes.

I'm going to have to get outside and check this out. But first, especially after missing two hours of sleep yesterday, I need a nap. Good-nap, and as always, stay awesome and...

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Cuddle Time

Good morning. Today I am going to my first story time at the library. The library calls it, "Cuddle Time," for those in my age group. I have to admit I'm a little nervous. It didn't help to wake up and find Mommy had already left for the day. Why is this a problem? It's a problem because she forgot to set out an outfit to wear. So Daddy and I are kind of freaking out. She knows that we are both incapable of picking out an appropriate outfit for public wear. I've got to look good. There will be other babies there probably judging my appearance. What if there are mommies there recruiting gentleman callers for their baby girls? And what's the deal with the 'cuddle' thing. No one's going to want to cuddle with a baby wearing clothes that don't match. I'd go just in my diaper, but it's like 30 degrees outside. Daddy and I looked at about 10 different outfits. Notice that I didn't say that I tried them all on. It practically takes all the king's horses and all the king's men to get me dressed. We found one we think might work. Be honest, how do I look?

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

It's Not Too Early

The other day I was at a department store and noticed something very peculiar. An entire section of the store was devoted to a special theme of flickering lights, red and green colors, indoor trees, and suggestions for a "wish list." Then yesterday, after my awesome 2-1/2 hour late afternoon nap, I saw that Mommy was looking through a catalog that had the same theme that the department store did. Apparently, she was preparing her wish list for this thing called, "Christmas." I don't know what this Christmas thing is exactly, but I think I'm going to like it. I started my own wish list. The first item: all I want for Christmas, and this is not a joke, is my two front teeth. Really, any teeth will do. We don't want the doc to say (again) at my next appointment, "he still doesn't have his teeth yet?" Back to my short but very well thought out list: a high definition television so I can enjoy watching Mommy watch her prime time network television smut. A jet plane would also be cool so we can get to our various weekend destinations more quickly. That way I could spend less time in my car seat and more time working on this list. The list will keep growing with items such as a magic crawling outfit, a baby talk-to-English converter, and some sort of mechanism that helps me utilize my diaper more effectively and without all the breath-holding and grunting. Then again, you could probably wrap a rock for me and I'll enjoy it all the same because of my affinity for wrapping paper. Perhaps we should save some of these items and toys for a future Christmas, particularly during a year when we have more room in our house. But where's the fun in that? I still have a few years before I'll understand any potential true meaning for this gift-giving day. So please: give me, give me, give me.

To my multitude of fans out there: it's not too early to begin shopping for me. There are plenty of things out there that I'll accept. I've got my loot stocking and I'm ready to receive. Please form a line. No pushing. Don't worry, you'll all get your turn to give me gifts. And no, the 's' at the end of gift was not a typo.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Carnivore

That's a picture of me from this morning. Below is a picture of me at six weeks. Not so big anymore, are you Mr. Bear? I did slouch a little just so Mr. Bear didn't start to feel inadequate.

I know I have done comparison blogs of myself with the past versus present before. Excuse me if you're bored, but I'm just amazed at my own progress. Do you remember 'Wrestling with Tiger the Lion?' Of course you do. It's a classic.

Well now I have no problem taking on Mr. Bear, Tiger, or that new roaring lion.

I still don't quite know what to make of that silly, roaring lion. He did get me smiling today. At first, I was a little afraid of him. Either way, I suppose I should not get too close to him or any of my animals. Why? Well, Mommy and Daddy said I'm going to start eating meat soon. I did some research and learned that meat comes from animals (two plus two equals four). I'd like to voice my opinion on this whole eating meat thing, but that articulate voice still remains in hiding. Besides, they'll probably shovel a spoonful of pureed, "Mmmm, isn't that good?!," down my throat and then tell me after I swallow that it was meat. So you might as well bring on the Filet Mignon, a rack of a cute baby lamb's ribs, and some roast lion, because Matthew's soon to be one hungry carnivore.

Monday, November 2, 2009

100


I was going to celebrate my 100th blog post by taking the day off and not posting. Then I realized that if I did that I would never reach 100, 101, and so on. So here I am and here is post #100:

After breakfast, I got my Monday going with with some refreshing exercise. First, I take a big gulp of water from my cup to make sure that I'm properly hydrated. That is very important, I guess. Then my morning workout routine commences. This morning's workout consisted of some practice crawls (I'm really making progress) and shooting some hoops. I don't exactly "shoot" hoops, yet. I feel it is important to first study the hoop, basket, and ball in order to learn the physical intricacies. Maybe by blog #200 I'll be hooping it up.


So Halloween was pretty fun, I think. Actually, the whole trick or treating thing was not what I expected. It was cold, dark, and candy-less. I did meet up with (I'm going to have to make something up because I don't know what her costume was exactly) a medieval princess and Bumblebee Transformer. They had a lot of fun running from house to house and begging for handouts.


The rest of the weekend was fairly relaxing. From my wagon, I supervised Mommy and Daddy raking leaves. I think I dislike raking just by looking at it. No raking for me- I'll keep my supervisor job, thank you.